642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

Put two people who hate each other in an elevator for 12 hours.  What happens? 

My family has two good friends who are older women.  The first one was our friend longer than I've been a live.  She was sneaking up on 100 when she passed away.  Although she was quiet, she was very smart, opinionated, and wealthy.  She never married and used her life up serving and helping others.  The second friend moved near us when I was about 12 years old.  Other than not being as quiet and being married, she is quite like the first.  They both are great examples of sharing their talents and serving others.

Imagine our surprise when our first friend told us that she and the other are not friends and don't care for one another.  We thought is was kind of funny because they are both so friendly and kind that you wouldn't imagine either would have ill feelings toward the other.  Nothing ever happened between them but I guess that's how friend number one felt.

For amusement, they are the two people who I have stuck into an elevator for 12 hours.

Polite smiles but silence.
Friend One is a bit more stubborn and just looks straight ahead.
Friend Two breaks the silence after just a minute.
"How are you, Friend One?"
"Fine, thank you."
Silence.
"Are you enjoying the spring flowers?"
"Yes, thank you."
Silence.

After only ten minutes stuck in the elevator, Friend One hits the alarm to call for help.  After getting no response, they pull many useful instruments from their purses.  {I guess that answers the question about why old women have such heavy purses.}  Together, they pull the cover over the mechanics and get to work.  Friend One has read a book about elevators and Friend Two is handy in the garage.  Once the work begins, they begin chatting.  A few tweaks and tightened nuts and bolts, and the elevator jumps back to work.  They   are both pleased with their work and congratulate one another.  They're all smiles and have learned much about each other while they worked.  Each repacked her respective handbag and the elevator came to a stop.  The doors opened and they both stepped off.

Silence.

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

Something you've always regretted saying.

"I hope you die."

She did.  She never came to fifth grade.

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

What you would run out of the house with if your house caught on fire. 

Because I don't like to think hard about this, let's suppose I am home alone the day the house burns down.  Thank goodness for insurance, right?

Other than people or animals, I think I would go for Jake's hard drive.  Stuff can be replaced but that has all of our memories and pictures in one place, so they won't be lost forever.

And, a Diet Coke.  It would still be cold from the fridge.  Of course, I would need a refreshing beverage while I watch the house burn and the firemen work.

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

Describe each person in your family with just one word.

Jake - doer
Joey - planner
Abigale - thinker
Noah - entertainer

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

Your friend calls to say she saw you in the back of a police car yesterday.  What happened?

I stole a penguin.  He was overly friendly and wouldn't leave me alone.  After trailing me around the zoo all afternoon, I guess I got attached.  I was pushing a stroller that had no rider, so as I neared the exit, I set fruit snacks and Cheese-Its in the seat and coxed the little guy in.  We made it to the car.  I lifted him into the car seat in the van and strapped him right in.  He didn't put up a fight, cooperating as best he could.  I don't know why strangers get so nosy but apparently a zoo official was tipped off.  I pretended to be surprised that the penguin wasn't Noah, but to no avail, I was detained....in the back of a police car.

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

Something you found

We slept and listened to the rain all night.  We were prepared to make the six hour drive home in the morning without my glasses.  On our way out of the campground, after my dad had prayed, we stopped at the river near the place I had played the day before.  The rain had stopped but the river was much higher and had even flooded the banks in a few places.  Following my dad's specific instructions, I walked into the river an exact number of steps.  Then, I stepped to the side exactly as my dad instructed.  Standing in the river, my dad told me to reach down by my feet.  I did.  And, I pulled out my glasses!  Only a few scratches, they were all in one piece.  It was our Virgin River Miracle.

Part 1: Something you lost

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

Something you lost

My glasses flew into the Virgin River as my cousin's long legs spun around, pushed by the current, and kicked them off my face.  We searched and searched to no avail.  Nervously, I went back to camp to tell my parents what had happened.  I felt sick about it because I knew my family wasn't in a place that we could replace the glasses without trouble.  As we sat, contemplating the situation, the rain began.  It rained all night, flooding the river banks.

Part 2: Something you found

642 Thing to Write About

642 Things to Write About

You are looking down through the skylight as the chefs prepare dinner for your ex-fiance's wedding.

I don't have an ex-fiance.  I dodged that bullet.  Sounds horrible, right?  I don't know how else to describe it.  We never were engaged because I made sure to run.  I know running seems like my M.O. {I don't know what M.O. even means} but really, I'm grateful I did.  When I dated Jake, I dare say that within three months I knew that I wanted to marry him.  When I dated the person involved with this story, I knew in three months to run for my life.  I'm not sure why I've disclosed this when I could have just written an entertaining anecdote with no specifics.

I really wouldn't want to cause a problem for everyone at the wedding, especially the unsuspecting guests.  But, the family and the bride {re-bride, technically} wouldn't be spared.  I wasn't a fan of any of them.  I also wouldn't want to really cause a problem for the chef or his business.  So, to make sure my naughtiness isn't tied to the chef, I would drop in from the skylight and mist the steaming plates, headed to the family, with something as entertaining, but not original, as a laxitive. 

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

Name the trees that stood in the neighborhood where you grew up.

Maybe those of you know them could tell me if you ever named these trees.

From my porch, the tree on the right: Sheldon
From my porch, the tree on the left: Mister

Robinson's front tree: Sheila
Robinson's back tree: Misses

Jones's front tree: Jones

The jungle next door: the Jungle

The pink blossom trees in front of Stephens's and Thompson's: the Girls

Our front trees were cut down on my dad's birthday in 2001.  This severed forever the relationship between Mister and Misses.  Even in her grief, Misses lived on.  Eventually, even she was lost.  But, she's not forgotten.  Her stump, apparently, sprouts life once in a while.  Mister and Misses lived long, happy lives together.  Under 1025 West, they held hands {read roots}.  Now they live in tree heaven together.

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

What a character holding a blue object is thinking right now.

"What is this?  It feels so funny in mouth.  It's warm, like a living thing, but then it turns cold, like death.  Then, it comes back to life.  And all the yelling when I get ahold of it!  Goodness.  Why don't they appreciate me or my skills?  Maybe one day they'll understand," thinks Daisy as she tries to sneak the blue heating pad away from Abbi.

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

Tell a story that begins with a ransom note.

"ThEy'Re MiNe!  tHe GrAbBeR, BeLt, AnD nOw I'vE gOt RuFfY, tOo!  ThEy'Re aLL sAfeLy HiDdEn AwAy.  YoU mAy FiNd ThEm BuT yOu'LL nEvEr ReAcH tHeM. bELt HaS tRieD tO eScaPE bUt I'vE gOt HiM tiEd Up nOW. IF yOu EvEr WaNt ThEm iN yOuR hOt LitTLe HaNdS aGaiN tHeN yOu BeTTeR foLLoW mY inSTRucTiONs ExAcTLy.

1) LiStEn tO yOUr MoThEr
2)  nO NaUghtiEs uSinG tOyS as ToOLs

IF yOu CaN dO tHiS fOr ONE DAY, yOu'Re 3 SpEciALs WiLL bE rEtuRned tO yOu UnHaRmEd.  GoOd LuCk."

He lost his grabber first.  He used it to slam his cousin's brand new laptop shut.  The next day, after the grabber had been surrendered, he used Belt {a long-armed monkey} to hit Daisy.  Before either were back in his possession, he left his dirty pj's and underwear on the floor, laying next to Ruffy.

This is my kunundrum.  If Noah gives up his toys with no fight, doesn't beg to get them back, and continues with naugtiness, I've obviously chosen an inefficient technique for teaching.  I guess until I find something more effective, I'll cuddle with a monkey and a dog and grab stuff at my leisure.

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

The Long-Lost Roommate


We called her "Invisible."  She lived at the end of the hall, across from Lisa's room.  They even shared a bathroom.  Invisible never left her room when she was in Logan and she NEVER stayed in Logan for the weekend.  Her real name was Britney, I think.  I'd have to check with a more reliable memory to know for sure.  We never heard her last name or any details about her life.

One afternoon, she came into the kitchen to make herself lunch.  I was in my room just next to the kitchen so I came out to be friendly.  I sat at the island and tried to make conversation.  I got only grunts or silence in response.  Invisible worked at the counter with her back to me.  Finally, she turned around and said, "You seem like a really nice person."  With that, she walked back to her bedroom.

Before Christmas, Lisa, Shari, and I decided to have our own celebration.  We exchanged gifts and made breakfast together.  It was a little awkward when Britney walked through.  I wonder if she thought we had all known each other before Logan, because we didn't.

One day, I don't remember if I was sitting in the kitchen when she came through or if I found her out there but I'm pretty sure I asked her if she was a friend of Britney's.  It was Britney.  She wasn't wearing makeup that day.  My bad, seriously, my bad.

The best thing about her was the day a maintenance guy knocked on the door and said he was supposed to fix something in Room #4, Invisible's room.  I let him in and went back to my homework in my own room.  After a few minutes he walked down the hall, threw something in the kitchen garbage, and left.  Lisa or Shari was home, too, and we couldn't resist.  We pulled the note out and read, "Girl locked in her room.  Apt. 6A Room 4."

Invisible had locked herself in her room, by accident I would guess.  She had a window that goes right out to the lawn.  She had two other people in her apartment.  But, she called the office and asked for help.  I wonder what the guy thought when he had to come and let her out.  It was so funny, so very funny.

Who knows where she is now, what she studied, or even how old she is.  I think she was four or five years older than me, at least.  Wherever she is, she's given us a few fun memories of Oakridge Apartment 6A. 

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

Something You Had That Was Stolen

I have no recollection of having anything stolen from me.  But there are a few things I would miss, if they were taken, and a few things I wouldn't miss, if they were taken.  

Things I wouldn't miss {in no particular order} :

•  my mattress
• vitamins
• facebook
• paint, playdough, glitter
• camp gear - don't tell Jake  

Things I would miss {in no particular order} :

•  Aveda products
• my iPad
• the Round {my special denim pillow}
• Pinterest
• my secret Amazon wishlist

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

I am an astronaut.  I had a perfect day.

I am the 10,000,000th million person to travel into space.  Our family is moving to Jupiter where I have been offered the prestigious position as Captain of the DIY Industry.  I never imagined I would ever travel into space due to my horrible fear of the black, gravity-less, overwhelming darkness that space is.  But, I've consented due to the fact that there hasn't been an injury or fatality related to space travel in over 100 years.  The technology and equipment offer a comfortable and luxurious ride.

There are booming economies on every planet.  I'm so grateful I was offered Jupiter when I was chosen as one of the nine Captain positions.  Mercury has a failing ice making industry.  The people there love the sun and heat but really haven't put two and two together, yet.  Venus had a successful market in shaving techniques and products but it seems humans are really pulling away from daily hair removal.  The industry there has yet to learn about the laser/Nair techniques used on Earth.  Earth's captain is having a heck of a time due to the struggles between the nations there and the total lack of financial sense.  We were able to change our money to Juppy's before the dollar lost all its value.  Fashion rules Mars.  They seem to be focusing a lot on mustaches right now.  What's the deal with mustaches?  Saturn can't seem to sell their vehicles.  I never thought Saturns were popular on Earth, I can't imagine how they'll sell them solar system wide.  Uranus has the monopoly on plumbing and paper making.  Neptune has taken over the music and entertainment industry.  It's such a pain to change all of my iTunes over to nepTunes.  And, Pluto, a joke.  It's the laughing stock of planets.  It has become a tourist attraction much like the Disneyland of Earth.

We live a comfortable life, much like Earth.  Jake leads the way in all home improvement, restoration, motorcycles, and hunting endeavors.  Abbi and Noah are in the top of their classes.  Abbi excels in her science and art endeavors while Noah has become quite an expert in fort building.

The DIY Industry on Jupiter is prosperous and flourishing.  All creative resources are in abundance and at my disposal.  As Captain, I have the edge in DIY creations.  I see, review, and analyze every DIY project before it is released to the solar system.  I have several special projects teams working solely on my ideas.  We're on the brink of major break-throughs in the most efficient laundry system.  We've already conquered meal planning, homework stations, and Subway art.

In addition to the opportunities we each have, there is and abundance of space available for pets.  And, due to the limited gravity, their hair sticks to them so there is absolutely no shedding.  Any animal can live in the house.  Also, we're testing out a new additive in animal feed that changes the function in their brains to make clean-up apart of their natural behavior.  All animals are automatically housetrained and clean up after themselves outdoors.  We have a clowder of Maine Coon cats we brought over with us, in addition to the dogs and farm animals Jake brought along with him.

I never imagined I'd become an astronaut/travel into space, but I did, and I am having a perfect day.

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

My Facebook Status Updates for 2017

February 13, 2017 - "Jake and I were sealed and became eternal companions four years ago today.  We got engaged six years ago!  Happy Day, Love Dove!"

May 13, 2017 - "Sixth anniversary is candy or iron so I sculpted Jake his favorite treats with the help of the local horseshoer.  I hope he likes it!"

June 5, 2017 - "I've been out of highschool longer than I spent in all of my school.  Dang it."

August 7, 2017 - "Noah is getting baptized today.  I am so excited for him and so proud to be his mommy!"

September 7, 2017 - "This marks the last year of Jake in his mid-30's!  Happy 36th, Lovey!"

October 17, 2017 - "Mid-30's ... I heard this is supposed to be the best decade of my life.  I'm hoping this is the best year of the best decade."

November 3, 2017 - "We have a teenager!!!!  Abbi is 13 today!  I can't believe it!  I'm so happy to be her mom!"

642 Things to Write About

642 Things to Write About

A houseplant is dying.  This is why it needs to live:

Grandpa/Uncle Paul has seen better days.  His strong, bright green leaves have turned downward.  There is red creeping in where there should be no red.  His fight towards the sunlight streaming through the window is a battle he can hardly bear to win.  But, once again, I decide to come through for him.  I give him a little twist towards the sun and fill the pot with water, making the soil soft again.

I save him because we've been together along time.  I just can't let him down.  You see, I've had some long lasting bamboo plants around.  In fact, I have one now that has got to be nearly four years old.  He's seen better days, too.  But, Grandpa/Uncle Paul and I are connected.

I got Uncle Paul in March of 2007.  He came in a wicker basket.  He seems to be quite a hardy plant, easy enough for even me to keep alive.  I had just moved into my Layton townhouse when he came home with me.

I got Grandpa in November of 2007.  I thought he would make a nice addition of greenery in my small townhouse.  As it turned out, his plant wasn't as forgiving as Uncle Paul.  Rather than lose the whole thing, I transplanted Uncle Paul into Grandpa.  Uncle Paul was a good plant and Grandpa was a much nicer pot than the basket that Uncle Paul came in.

So more than just what you might call an emotional connection to the Grandpa/Uncle Paul, I have a connection of time.  I have very little that has been with me as long as them.  I have a different home.  I had a Prius then and have had a Rav4 since, and now drive a van.  I was very single and now am married with two children.  I had a job in Centerville then, transferred to Harrisville, and am now a homemaker.

The few things that might still be the same are my toaster, my purple coat, my bed {but not the comforter}, my cedar chest, a painting of the Ogden Temple {which is now outdated}, a two-drawer filing cabinet, my washer & dryer, a small bookcase, and maybe some socks.  Can you see why I have to keep the plant alive?