Sunday, July 29, 2012

this is me

this is me

How are you different today then you were 10 years ago?

During the summer of 2002, I was trying to find a job on the East Coast.  I really wanted to move back there and be a nanny.  So I did it.  I was only there a few months, and it was a LONG few months.  I turned 19 in New Jersey.

I was different because I was ready to try almost any adventure, and move anywhere to do it.  Now, the adventures I crave are at home ... wife, mom, cooking, blogging, teaching, crafting, making our house a home, hopefully increasing our family population at some point, etc.  In 2002, I had more aspirations to be a public figure than I did to be a homemaker.  I wouldn't say I settled or changed my mind, but for everything there is a season.

How are you different today then you were 5 years ago?

In 2007, I was a year out of college and bought my first home.  Then, I decided to change career fields.  I left the credit union business and went to Deseret Industries. Deseret Industries opened a whole world to me of people and lifestyles I hadn't really encountered, let alone, worked side by side with.

I was different then because my main focus was on Relief Society (my ward) and being an aunt.  I loved the sisters I got to work with and the bishoprics were awesome!  I learned so much about the Relief Society and how to really serve in a calling.  Now, I'm making another occupational change that will remove me from the world of D.I. and put me at home.  And, the time I used to spend going to ward activities and meetings has been replaced with being a mom.  I still have a calling, but it's not my main hobby anymore.

How are you different today then you were 1 year ago?

Last year, I was drowning.  I felt ungrateful.  I was overwhelmed.  I was confused.  I had gotten just what I wanted but didn't know how to deal with it.  I had expectations that were through the roof.  I was spread very thin and felt like I wasn't good at anything because nothing had my undivided attention. 

I was different then.  After some time has passed, some help (family, friends, therapy, and RX), and a lot of self-talk, I've learned to enjoy each day ... pretty much.  I know I'm not good at everything and I can laugh it up.  I do what I can and sometimes I don't do what I can.  But, my family is healthy, basically happy, and not hungry so what else can I do?

How are you different today then you were 1 month ago?

Last month, I was getting a little overwhelmed again.  Apparently, I struggle when I feel like I am out of control and don't have a specific plan.  Some of my co-workers tease me about my lists and organizational skills but really, at work I can keep things pretty much the way I like them.  Now, in my personal life, patience is a lesson my soul fights.

I was different last month because I was being too critical of my life, and WAY too impatient.  Now, I've got a little perspective.  Oddly, life is much more enjoyable when you get a little perspective.


Joyce said...

A little perspective is always good, but sometimes it makes you wanna kick yourself for not coming up with it sooner. :)