Sunday, September 28, 2008

Relief Society Broadcast

The speakers were so great! I could have listened to them all night. I was even wishing President Uchtdorf would have gone on and on. After feeling the inspiration to improve my own efforts, I have determined to set a realistic goal and go forward. Unfortunately, knowing myself, sometimes I hear moving talks by Church leaders and feel the Spirit whispering to me and still I don't change. I write a few notes but then turn the page.

But....this time is different. Here's the deal: this week I have been thinking that I may be in a little bit of a rut. I don't want to minimize my blessings but I haven't moved forward in a while. Last night, I received the antidote to my situation. The sisters spoke on varying topics but had one common theme - service. Serving in my calling, serving as a member of Relief Society, and serving in the temples. Reaching outside of myself is the cure for what I'm feeling. Plus, besides serving, I can spend my time creating - all sorts of things. And creating can be service too. Developing myself is a good way to spend my time and will bring satisfaction (from what I understand).

Let's get down to brass tacks - I'm going forward with full force. There are opportunities to serve every time I turn around. There are opportunities to improve my skills and talents. I am a little ways from perfect but I can at least take a step. That's the goal....a step at a time. Wish me luck!

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Aspiration: Be A Bum

definition: to somehow support myself and remain or increase social activity while decreasing the time obligated to structured activities (ie: employment)
objective: to be obligated to as little as possible while still maximizing happiness

Pro:

  1. no work = no work stress
  2. when fun happens, i'll be available
  3. in case i ever lose my job during rage i won't go through "failure depression" because i will have actually made a step towards my goal
  4. less people will be fighting against my existence
  5. could find some sort of fun, punk-kid type job
  6. save a ton because i'll be forced to move in with someone
  7. overall, i'd appreciate a lot of things about being a bum

Con:

  1. only have my income until i become uncontrollably honest
  2. can't live independently if i succeed in becoming a bum
  3. a lot of this seems selfish
  4. won't actually save a ton because i won't make as much
  5. may impede goals that are "wildly important"
  6. even if i have the time, i won't be able to afford all the fun that happens
  7. have to give up a few major assets
  8. my happiness may become shallow and temporary
  9. my time will become less valuable, thus taken for granted
  10. this all may mean i take for granted what i already have

I guess after thinking this all through it may not be what I really want. The grass was seeming greener on the other side until I really thought out what I'd lose. I do like all of the things I get to do and the things I have. Maybe if I learn to appreciate them more I'll watch my tongue, soften my heart, and protect what I've got.

Lesson Learned: Bums may not have the life it's cracked up to be.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

I'm trying! Again....

I just wrote, and deleted, a post reflecting awful aspects of my personality. I have decided there is no reason to air my dirty laundry, right? They had to do with things like sneaky anger, dirty dishes, grandpa's dead wife, not excelling in my calling, i killed my fish, etc. Plus...if I make those things public then they'll be harder to put in the past. And so instead I am going to try to give a few examples of my redeeming qualities. Hopefully, by spending time thinking about good things instead of poor things, I'll change my perspective (about me) and be a better person (someday). If I'm going to invest time in improving my quirks, I should probably choose good ones.

  1. i don't mind telling people about stupid stuff i do (in fact, i can't help but tell)
  2. i made some really great cookies last week
  3. i've been to institute twice so far!
  4. i try to do my job well
  5. i try not to say everything i think
  6. i take pleasure in keeping a clean, organized house
  7. i'm good at sudoku
  8. i have creative aspirations
  9. i pretty much really like my family
  10. i really appreciate what my friends and family do for me
  11. i feel pretty good about the gospel

Of course, I can still work on all of the aforementioned items but they are a worthy use of my time. It's gotta be better than the alternatives, right? I'm always in the market for new hobbies and stuff so maybe I should make these my new hobbies. I'm not feeing real great about the way I am now, of course I've proven I can't change overnight, but maybe I'll have fewer regrets if I give it my best shot. So anyway.....

Lesson Learned - When the time for action comes, the time for preparation has passed.