Saturday, February 21, 2009

I used to have dreams.


#1 - Once, I was a pickle in a jar. It was frightening. I was living peacefully with my friends. Then, all the sudden, a fork starting stabbing frantically in the jar. I knew it was me or the other guy (pickle). As the prongs of the fork pierced into the flesh of my pickle skin, I woke up.


#2 - Another time as I dreamed peacefully in my sleep, I discovered that I was, in fact, a hotdog....on a bun. It was a pretty good life. As I lay on the soft, white bread bun, I thought about how good my life was. Then, somebody squirted ketsup on me. I knew it was over. Then I woke up.


C - A more moving dream was the one when I was Martin Luther King, Jr. I was a man with a plan. I worked hard. I was genuine. I had work to get done. I spoke to audiences everywhere. I even gave the infamous "I have a dream" speech. (Oddly, my subconscious can repeat a lot of that speech.) After a long day, I went back to my hotel. Someone shot me. My wife cried and cried. Then I woke up.

Disclaimer: these were long ago and I've dreamt nothing as interesting since then.

3 comments:

Katherine said...

I can't believe that no one has commented on this yet! I have so many things to say, and a few questions...

1. When you were a pickle, did you have eyes? Because I would imagine the pickle juice would sting in your eye. Maybe you were a blind pickle, and you could just sense that a fork was coming your way? I need to know.

2. During your MLK Jr. dream, do you think you were actually talking out loud? I guess we'll never know.

3. What does it feel like to get stabbed with a fork?

4. What kind of drugs were you on?

:)

Lala said...

This post - this is the reason that blogs were created. I love this post.

Sarah Elizabeth said...

I dream in plot lines...like a movie. And I am an actor just playing a park in the script. But I have never dreamed I was edible. Pretty sure I was a guy kissing me once though...does that make me gay???