Monday, May 25, 2009

San Diego - Part IV

the animals

I don't know who they think they are. Do they feel like celebrities or like captives? I'm not sure they feel like they owe me anything even though I paid to come see their fur faces. For example,

Is this monkey so depressed he can't smile at us one time? It's not just the monkey who has no regard for the public. For example,

This bear did next to nothing. She and the brother polar bear were supposed to be the highlight of the zoo, so we waited. Let me tell you, she did something alright. Right in front of our faces. It was ridiculous.

Then, there was false advertising.

These guys were in a glass trap. Not only couldn't I touch them, I had to ride a moving sidewalk right passed them. Fortunately, we found a bench to sit on. Unfortunately, there were no macaroni penguins and this was not the "Penguin Encounter" the sign had prepared me for.

Last, and no where near the least, the whales!

I have so many questions.
1. how the heck do you train a killer whale?
2. how do you teach it not to kill you?
3. how do you dare be the first person to stand on its snout?
4. how do they all know to line up together?
5. how do they know when it's their turn to do tricks?
6. how do you teach it to splash the crowd?
7. how do you teach it to hug?
8. do they feel like celebrities?
9. how much does a trainer get paid?
10. if they are returned to the ocean are they going to be treated like kids who were home-schooled and now they came to regular school?

Please help me.


Kellie said... absolutely have a way of killing me with your words! You should be a stand up comedian or something! :)